I’d like to reflect and explain the inspiration behind some of the drawings I have been posting to my instagram feed lately.  Many years ago while I was in school I tended to have a difficult time staying focused while sitting in a lecture.  I would often times find myself getting lost in my thoughts and it didn’t seem to help to “try harder”.  I remember experiencing frustration in classes as I would tend to miss out on most of what my professor was teaching and I always seemed to be behind in my classes.  I remember a Teacher in High School mentioned some letters to me, A-D-D… and informing me that there was medicine to help this focusing issue.  I had no desire to take a drug to fix my “problem”.  As I continued my education however, it didn’t just get better or go away.  Because of my not so incredible GPA when I reached College I was awarded the opportunity to take a course for the underachievers.  Lart 2000.  However, in this class someone actually took time to talk with me about different styles of learning and gave me a few tips on staying focused in a lecture hall.  I remember specifically someone suggesting that I doodle on a piece of paper. I didn’t quite understand why this would help but I gave it a try.  While I loved drawing, I had always felt frustrated with my attempt at what I thought was art at the time.  I compared myself to my brother who was an Incredible realist and when you’re a kid you tend to get things written on your DNA.  So Art in drawing form was not a talent that I had.  I leaned into music and decided my brother was the artist in the family, I was the musician.  Later on in life I pursued art again and found a love for drawing and painting.  Though I was not an accomplished realist like my brother, I enjoyed impressionism very much and enjoyed taking courses in College learning about lines, shapes, lighting, and color.  These principles have helped tremendously in my pursuit of Photography.  Still often times while drawing I would experience anxiety and feel pretty worn out because I put so much focus and pressure on myself to make something interesting and accurate.  These drawings that I have been posting do not feel the same. Over the years I have been doodling all over homework, books, and whatever is available to help keep focused.  I don’t understand the science behind this practice but it actually seems to work for me.  In the last several years I’ve decided to keep some order to my scribbling.  I have dedicated journals for these unconscious drawings, without them once again I am easily districted by my thoughts.  I believe in all things we can look at ourselves and make judgments.  I am attempting in my older years to accept my challenges and my “disorder” in a different light. I don’t really know what Art is but I know that the process of being present in a learning environment and also being free while making these drawings have been life changing and maybe that pursuit, in and of itself, is the real art.